Half empty or half full?

Can it be? Have I not blogged since February? Yep, looks that way. But, I’ve written…and oh how I’ve written. I finally finished the play, The C. A. Lyons Project, edited the novel, Moon Over Miami and edited a short story, One Night. I’ve just not blogged. But doesn’t a blogger blog? Isn’t this part of the blogging process, to be disciplined enough to blog regularly? Have I failed by not blogging regularly?

That’s a matter of opinion, isn’t it? Part of what writers – okay some writers – do is to beat ourselves up about what we don’t write, about what we didn’t complete. I thought about this when I hadn’t made what I thought was enough progress on my play.

It was a harrowing time. Personal challenges notwithstanding, I taught three high school classes, 35 miles away two days a week – a total of 140 miles; matriculated as a full time graduate student while freaking out because my PC crashed before I’d transferred all the files to the MAC. Did I mention I was in the throes of grief after having lost one of my dearest friends to cancer? Yet, there I sat remorseful because I hadn’t written enough. Imagine that!

No! I’m not looking for the sympathy card here. Rather, I’m laughing at myself. The wisdom of Beau O’Reilly, my graduate advisor echoes. He sat there as patient as Buddha as I apologized for not having made enough progress on my manuscript. That brilliant man simply ignored me.

“How are things going?”

I ticked off the items on my list.

“And you’re teaching still?”

“Yep.”

“How many classes?”

“Three.”

“And you’re not doing enough?”

Catholic guilt is a monster. I’d accomplished so much, but all I could look at was what I hadn’t completed, at what I hadn’t accomplished. Gass half empty VS half full? All I could do was laugh because I lost sight of what’s important. It helps to have someone to remind us to focus on the larger picture.

When the boat is rocking on the waves and struggling to make it to shore, a beacon of light sure does help. Thanks Beau!

CODA:  As I completed the edit of this blog, I looked up to see a full rainbow!

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